I've Been Thinking About Anger

My mom always used to say that being angry was a waste of energy. I've been taught my whole life to keep my temper in check, to be slow to anger, etc. 

And I do believe all of that. 

But I also believe that anger can and does serve a purpose. 

I've read or heard that anger is a secondary emotion. First we feel hurt, betrayed, insulted, disrespected, etc. And then we feel angry at someone for doing whatever caused those feelings. Possibly angry at ourselves for being in the situation. Angry that it happened at all. But the anger is our reaction to being hurt in some other way.

This is where we have a choice to make.

We can hold on to that anger, hold a grudge, and be miserable and bitter about it's cause for the rest of our lives.

Or, we can look inward to understand why we feel angry so we can learn from it and then let it go.

Hence, the purpose of anger. If we take the time to consider why we are angry, we can learn a lot about ourselves and understand our boundaries and limits better. Which can lead us to making necessary changes, either in ourselves, our environment, or our relationships.

I am smack in the middle of exactly that right now. I have been spurred into making changes that are long overdue because I was finally angry enough to realize there are things I can no longer  tolerate. It has helped me get past my fear and trepidation about those changes. Gone are the excuses to keep the status quo. Now it's all about getting myself into a better and healthier situation.

Much like everything else in this life, it all comes down to choice. How we react or respond to feeling angry is far more significant than feeling it in the first place.

Holding onto anger is harmful.

Learning from it is growth.